My Reflections on James 3:1-12
IN MY WORDS
Is your heart set on influencing other people in the Christian faith? Be careful! Think twice before you open your mouth! Are you really cut out for this? You will be judged based on what you say and how you say it. Its's true that we all mess up over and over. If anyone is consistently good at communicating well, they are pretty much perfect, and they've probably also mastered self-discipline for their whole body.
The tongue is small yet powerful. It's like a bit in a horse's mouth that we can use to control which way the horse trots, or the rudder used to steer a ship even when it's being driven by great gusts of wind! It's like an itty bitty spark that ignites the whole forest into a burst of flames. Little thing, but big impact! That little tongue can wreak havoc in our lives, bringing evil and mayhem with our words.
Isn't it ironic that we can tame all sorts of wild animals - mammals, birds, reptiles and even sea creatures - but we can't even tame our own tiny tongues? It thrashes around causing also sorts of toxic trouble.
Think about this hypocrisy! We use our tongues to praise God, just like we should! But then we turn right around and slam our fellow humans, those who have the dignity of being created in the very image of God! One mouth, two very different ways of talking! Why in the world do we do this? That's not the way it should be! It's like turning on your water faucet and not knowing whether it will be salt water or fresh water filling your glass! Can olives grow on a fig tree, or figs dangle from a grape vine? Nope! So why do the salty speech and the fresh life-giving speech come from the same source, the same mouth?
HERE AND NOW
As I thought about this passage in relation to our current culture, a few scenarios quickly came to mind.
First, I thought about social media, online news, and trolls. It raises my blood pressure to read the comment threads on even what would seem to be the least controversial articles or posts. People can be so vicious with their techno-tongues, also known as their keyboards and touch screens. Eek. Can't we even have civil conversations without the insults, slurs, mud-slinging and other sludge? On the flip side, the Internet is also a good way to hold others accountable for their words. If there is a false teacher who is misrepresenting God's message, there are other faithful "watch dog bloggers" who can alert others to the problem before too much damage is done. I am so thankful to many of these for their patient research and their careful words of caution. There is certainly a time for correction and constructive criticism, if it comes from a heart that loves truth and grace.
Then I thought of my job. I work on a crisis and referral phone line operated by a non-profit community service agency. The people who call us need help, but not only with practical things like rent or food pantries. So many of them are processing trauma and stress, and they really need a compassionate person listening to them on the other end of the line. Do we say whatever comes to our minds? Nope! We are carefully trained in protocol, and every conversation is recorded for potential evaluation and feedback. We know what to say and what not to say. We learn to validate their emotions, deescalate crises, ask questions to uncover other hidden needs, offer options, empower them to make their own decisions, share resources, and focus on their needs instead of our own personal stories and beliefs. We learn not to shame them, patronize them, boss them around, or make empty promises. It is all through our words and our tone of voice. Does that mean that the call center staff are like scripted robots? Nope! We are caring human beings. We are resourceful. We each have our own creative style within the common parameters, and our clients appreciate the compassion that we communicate through our words. As per our agency's well-researched policies, we have invested the time to learn how to communicate effectively in stressful situations. The more we practice these skills, the easier it is to make our words come out well. We have a duty to represent this agency well. Likewise, as a Christian, I have a duty to represent God well as his ambassador. He hears every word in my heart and on my tongue. My words reflect on him, and can either attract others to him or repel them from him. Thankfully he teaches me how to speak with kindness, truth, insight, sincerity, dignity, respect, and encouragement.
The third thing I thought about relates to the questions I posed on the Read+Reflect+Respond page, which is how do situations affect what you say? In what circumstances are you likely to speak poorly? For me, beyond just the grumpiness of being tired or hungry, the real verbal vomit spews when I let fear and shame speak in my head. I can amass a whole toxic arsenal of potential counter-accusations and insults if I feel like I'm about to be unfairly attacked. That happened to me recently as I anticipated a difficult conversation. Fortunately, I caught myself in my triggered agitation and realized what (and why) this was happening. So I took the time to untangle my emotions and fill my arsenal with confidence and kindness instead. It paid off. I could speak intentionally with grace and hope and understanding instead of self-defensive blame-shifting. It was an upbeat and productive conversation, but if I'd walked into it with the fear/shame soundtrack on full blast, I could have ended up with a tense conflict or a silent smoldering angst. What a difference our words make! But even before that, what a difference it makes to realize what emotions and internal voices are fueling our outward voice, and start the adjustment right there. Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks. I'll write more about that later on another of my blogs.
Read the other posts for this passage:
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